Update on Life

Not forgotten the blog just been a hard time with getting my head together to write much, l have done short tweets though usually from work.

My dad has been in the care home and we have visited pretty much every evening. I have also been on nights and my body has had a hard time this time adjusting. I have averaged 2 or 3 hours sleep a day or night depending if l am on or off duty and the rest of the time l have just been lying around like a wet noodle just feeling to drained to do much.
Last week l went and got another of my bad coughs and have now pretty much lost my voice again so waiting for it to all clear up.

The hospital social worker has not been to helpful she took on my dads case. I have extended his care home stay 3 times as my mum did not feel up to coping and my dad was not 100% happy about being able to manage. The worker was all "he can stay as long as he wants don't worry" but as soon as l went to arrange things l would get a huge lecture.
last week she visited my mum and made clear that there would be no extensions he was coming home this Tuesday regardless. I pointed out the ambulance transport was booked. She was not listening to me just chanting he can not stay ANY longer he HAS to come home. She visited my father told the care home we demanded he goes home no matter what and told him that it was "not his choice to stay in his own home once home" I had to try and calm him down as he was very upset at this. My plan was as soon as he was home the ss was out and a new care worker in l was not having her around.

Last thursday he started to get a bad chest infection, something he is prone to. I got some anti B from the Dr. Only amoxycillan as useful as sugar water but it was something. I wanted him to stay in the home till he was over the infection, the home were happy but no point in speaking to ss as it was made clear no was going to be the answer.

So dad got back on Tuesday at about 15:00. My mum was worried about how he seemed, l put it down to her usual 'molehill out of a mountain'. When l got back at 18:15 he was not good. About 19:30 It took hub and l to get him up to go to the loo and he was not too coherent. The carer's turned up at 19:40 to put him to bed but l decided to send them away and got him an ambulance.

As usual a fantastic pair but after getting him on 02 asap as his saturation was 60% and his pulse was all over between 20 and 49 his temperature was not registering in one ear and 33 in the other he went straight into resus. The stabilised him and he is back in hospital. When hub and mum visited yesterday they said he looked to be dying. Lips blue, non responsive and incoherent. Today the physio rang me to get an idea of what he could or couldn't do and said he was sitting up, and asking for another cup of tea.

The care home said he had not slept the night before he was due home and then he had the ride around in the ambulance till he got home and we all feel it tipped him over the edge. Had he been allowed to stay in the home till he recovered he would have been ok.

We will possibly look at longer term care say 3 or 4 months then reassess if he can cope at home. The care home he was in are happy to have him back they all love him, the only problem was distance for my mum, we will see what happens.

I am fairly slow on work at the moment a big worry for me. Hub doesn't worry l do will see what happens.

Little Old Staffie

He was a little old black and white staffie. He came in as a stray. A nasty testicular tumour, his skin covered with sores, many infected, there was a suspicious lump in his abdomen of another possible tumour, he was very thin.

On admit he was placed on a drip, given some antibiotics, food and water, of which he drank a lot 3 bowls full. He was given some id (easy to digest) and ate ravenously then slept snuggled up on his bed.
The next day his drip was removed and he was just given water and lots of small meals of id. And finally cuddles and walks.
He was a happy soul despite his health not being good, and he slept 99% of the time. He was not in a fit state to be shipped off to the kennels, and was a “3 dayer”.

On Wednesday night following the vets instructions the auxiliary got the little old staffie out for me and held him while l clipped up his leg and inserted an iv catheter. He was happy to settle down on the prep table with lots of fuss.
I looked at the 20ml syringe of yellow pentobarb l had drawn up although he only needed 10ml at most. With a grim sense of humour l always feel overkill was better than underkill, strange the things you think of, terrible to most people but a fact of life in the veterinary world.

We fussed him and talked gently when he settled down for his long sleep, as his heart ceased we gave him one last hug and thought that whatever had happened before at least his last days had been comfortable for him. Then his body was slid into a bag and placed in a cold area.

Life flowed on around us and we stepped back into the role of helping the living, death slipping from our minds, until at different time’s death called to us to meet him again as his helper.